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A lady and her lover

Man: Baby, I love you, would you please marry
me?
Woman: (stands up and lands a stinging slap
on his face) I have waited more than 9yrs, I
have prayed, fasted, sowed seeds, bought books
and listened to tapes, even went out of my way
to be nice to every male specie of marriageable
age!
I took up new hobbies, watching football and
play station. I went to Daystar. From Daystar, I
went to House on the Rock, from House on the
rock I went to Guiding Light Assembly,
Phronesis Christian Centre Int’l, MFM, Christ
Embassy, Redeemed, From there I went to This
Present Winners looking every where for you. I
went from a size 14 to a size 10, so that when
you see me you’d love what you see.
I left Lagos, went to Abuja, from Abuja I went to
Port- Harcourt, then I went all the way to Kano I
joined hi-five, from hi-five to faceboook, then I
went to twitter, I even had a blog on which I
ranted, hoping yōϋ would show up! for where?
I uploaded only my best pictures on Facebook,
in fact I took photo sessions to look my best, all
for you o! I attended all the weddings, whether
the invitation was direct or indirect! The next
place I was hoping to check was the moon,
before you crawled out, crawled out from the
house directly next to mine!
So it was you all this while? The neighbour I
said hello to every morning?
Were you trying to destroy my faith?
You almost rendered my prayer life useless?
What were you waiting for?
What sign where you looking for?
Do you want to kill me before you reveal
yourself?!!!
Now be a gentleman, get down on your knees
and put that ring on my finger!!.

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